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Fear Isn’t the Enemy... But Letting It Control You Is

🎧Hear it From Me🎧
7:49

Fear shows up for all of us and in a lot of different ways. It can wear the mask of “I’ll do it soon” or “someday.” It can whisper that, "you’re not ready" or "you’re not good enough". And it will always tell you the timing isn’t right because you may be waiting for that “perfect” moment. But here’s the truth: if you let fear stay in the driver’s seat, you’ll never get where you want to go.

Fear Comes in Many Forms

Fear of failure. Fear of success. Fear of the unknown. Fear of change. Sometimes, it’s even the fear of learning something new.

Take AI for example. I’ve talked before about how avoiding AI from fear or self-doubt will only hold you back. You don’t have to use AI if you really don’t want to, but understanding it is as important as learning how to use a computer was when they first came out. Not everyone liked computers at the start, but now they’re part of our daily life. AI isn’t going away just because you don’t like it.

And that isn’t just about technology, it’s how life goes. It moves on and grows even if you don’t.

How Fear Can Quietly Hold You Back

A lot of people have dreams they can clearly picture for themselves 5 years from now, but fear keeps some from even taking the first step. That fear can come out verbally like:

  • “I’ll get to it soon.” --- When though? Do you KEEP saying that and "soon" seems to never come? 

  • “I’d love to do that one day” --- Again, how far away is "one day"? It sure would be nice to get it on the calendar to know what day it is. 

    • Side Tip: When you say these first two especially, get SOMETHING on the calendar to work on your goal. Even if that is blocking 1 hour a week for focused time on small steps.  

  • “I am waiting until I am ready.” --- Truly? You will NEVER be ready if you have been saying that for a while with no real effort toward being "ready". Because you realize over time of just doing the small steps, doing the things that take you out of your comfort zone, putting in that real effort, that being "ready" is just our subconscious mind's way of saying, "It's okay to not get started yet, you're not ready." And the only one that can get things going is YOU. 

  • “What if success changes my life in ways I'm not prepared for?” - Fear of success is real and often disguised as "playing it safe." More visibility, responsibility, and growth can feel overwhelming. But these are the very things that lead to bigger opportunities and deeper fulfillment. 

Those thoughts (among countless others) are limitations we put on ourselves. We are our own creators. We make our own reality. But that only happens when we put in the work, stay consistent, keep learning, and stay open to growth.

When fear takes over, we stop before we even start.

My Own Experience With Fear

I've faced a variety of fears in my journey so far (and still working through some as well). I've had the fear of sounding inexperienced, fear of not knowing what to post or say, fear of coming across in a way that didn't feel like me. Sometimes those fears would stall me before I even tried. Instead of taking action, I'd overthink my next move until the opportunity or motivation seemed to have passed. Eventually, I realized these weren't just little insecurities... They were rooted in something bigger. A fear of success. Because taking action, posting, showing up, trying something new... It all meant stepping into the version of myself who was visible, consistent, and capable. And honestly, it was both exciting and intimidating. 

I didn't even realize I had a fear of success until I knew it existed. I had never considered we may be afraid of the thing we want so much, but it made so much sense. Sometimes, the idea of more people knowing who you are, recognizing you, or expecting more from you can feel intimidating. If your business grew to the point where you had to hire others or expand, that's a big responsibility, and it can feel like a lot. 

Here's a trick I had used: Close your eyes and picture your life 3-5 years from now, with your goals achieved and abundance in the areas you value most. In this future, you've replaced jealousy and self-doubt with gratitude and connection. You're thriving, proud of the risks you took, and thankful you didn't trade those opportunities for the comfort zone. 

If you practice visualization, meditation, or maybe want to give it a shot, ask future you: "What would you tell me right now?" Future you already knows the challenges you're facing and exactly how you overcame them. 

If I had let all that fear stop me forever, I never would have:

  • Stepped into entrepreneurship in 2019 with my microblading business. Which taught me a great deal about business to get me started

  • Started in the real estate world and have had the chance to help the clients that I have had the honor of being a part of their real estate journeys.

  • Made videos and content, even when it has pushed me way outside my comfort zone at times.

  • Put myself out there NOW more than I ever had in my microblading business (and creating systems so I don't get burnout)

I still push myself every day. And yes, I sometimes cringe or second-guess my work. But I do it anyways. That’s how growth happens.

Imposter Syndrome is Part of the Journey

Imposter syndrome can hit hard. You might feel like you’re “faking it.” But here’s the thing: as you keep doing the work, learning, and improving, you stop faking it at some point. Eventually, you become it.

Maybe you don’t feel like you’ve “made it” yet, but past you would be amazed at how far you’ve come. Past you would be proud. And future you? They already know you’ve got this!

Fear Doesn’t Disappear but it Loses Power When You Act Anyway

At the end of the day, the only person who can truly push you forward is you. You can learn from others, take courses, read books, or get advice. But only you can look fear in the face and say, “You’re not going to stop me. You can sit with to me for a bit if you want, but I’m still moving forward.”

Eventually, fear gets bored of the ride. And what’s left is you, surrounded by the positivity, momentum, and confidence you’ve been building all along.

What About You?

Fear shows up differently for everyone. If you’re open to sharing, what fear is hold you back from your goals or dreams right now?